GAME :: Ask Wednesday Addams
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Dear Mr. Mill Tycoon,Milltycoon wrote:Dear Ms. Addams--
What are your thoughts on the actress Christina Ricci?
I believe Miss Christina Ricci is a fine actress, and coincidentally, she bears a slight resemblance to me. Perhaps she could play me in a movie, if ever I become famous. What do you think?
Thank you.
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Dear Mr. THE J-Dude,THE J-Dude wrote:To: Wednesday Addams
From: The J-Dude
Subject: Music
Hello!
I would like to know what your favorite music is to listen to while contemplating possible "accidents".
Thank you!
I like your avatar very much. Is that a bloody toothbrush? At first I mistook it for an axe, but then I realized that gingivitis is much scarier and that was surely your intent.
I am very fond of the music of Mr. Justin Bieber. I realize this is not to everyone's taste. My parents consider it extremely bizarre behavior, but thenGrandmamma reminds them that they went through a rebellious phase too.
Here is a playlist for you that my parents would approve:
- The Misfits - Skulls
Mr. Warren Zevon (R.I.P) - Roland the Headless Thompson Gunner
Bauhaus - Bela Lugosi's Dead
The Rolling Stones - Paint It Black
Mr. Alice Cooper - Welcome to My Nightmare
Oingo Boingo - Dean Man's Party
Screamin' Jay Hawkins - I Put A Spell On You
Poe - Haunting
Siouxie and the Banshees - Halloween
Led Zeppelin - Gallows Pole
Talking Heads - Psycho Killer
Mr. Donovan - Season of the Witch
Cranberries - Zombie
Blue Öyster Cult - Don't Fear The Reaper
Mr. Jimi Hendrix - Voodoo Chile
Mr. Albert King - Born Under A Bad Sign
Thank you.
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Dear Mr. Lantern,Lantern wrote:Dear Ms. Adams,
Besides Halloween what holidays do you celebrate?
Sincerely
Lantern
My, you do have a knack for questions!
My very favorite holiday is Æthelred II's (the Unready) Birthday on March 18th. As I'm sure you recall from your lessons, the slaughterous old Vikings took advantage of Æthelred's youth and inexperience to steal the island of Britain, or at least large segments of it. Æthelred in turn ordered a massacre of Danish settlers, and ushered in a period hallmarked by bloodthirsty battles and bribery. We celebrate the birth of this mighty figure in the Addams household in grand fashion. There is much swinging of battle-axes, throwing of Danegelt, tossing of daggers and imbibing of mead. Who would not love such a holiday?
Thank you.
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Ok, much better.
Ok, much better.
Last edited by THE J-Dude on Sun Oct 07, 2012 8:53 pm, edited 1 time in total.
- Wednesday Addams
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Dear Professor n00less cluebie,n00less cluebie wrote:Dear Wednesday,
What are your thoughts on the Ashapur Society?
-n00less cluebie
Allow me to paraphrase Mr. Jule Styne:
- ♪ ♫ A knotted silk garotte may be quite Eastern continental, but guillotines are a girl's best friend. ♪ ♫
Thank you.
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Dear Mr. kude,kude wrote:Dear Wednesday,
What is your favorite place to vacation?
It is very nice to meet you. From your avatar, I see that you like snakes. I like snakes, too. I would like people to call me "Cobra", in fact. I think we shall be friends.
To answer your question, I don't really have a favorite vacation spot. Our family travels regularly, but most of theses jaunts have been rather disappointing to me. For example,
- The Dead Sea: Not what I expected at all.
Death Valley: Not what I expected at all.
The Skeleton Coast: Not what I expected at all. We did make a side trip to safari in Kenya, and I got my very own Winchester Model 70, but the only game available was too reminiscent of our pet Kitty Kat for me to enjoy the hunt. *chagrin*
Tombstone, Arizona: Not what I expected at all. I have a better collection in my own backyard.
Devil's Island: Not what I expected at all.
Hell's Kitchen: Most definitely not what I expected at all. Although the post-gentrification real estate market may be considered somewhat hellish, I suppose.
Thank you.
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Dear Mr. Enzo1997,Enzo1997 wrote:Dear Wednesday,
What is your favorite movie?
-Enzo
How very nice of you to come out of your shell.
My favorite film is Bambi Meets Godzilla (1969).
This classic of animation is the work of a singular artist, who bravely threw both traditional production values and copyright law to the wind, thus presaging by several decades the future of web cinema. It has been recognized as one of the 50 Greatest Cartoons. Its delicate haiku-like grace will haunt you, I promise.
Thank you.
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Dear Mr. Lantern,Lantern wrote:Dear Wednesday,
Your family shows a fondness for black, white and grey. It appears your entire house is decorated in those 3 colors on TV. Even your wardrobes.
My question is what other color do you like?
Sincerely
Lantern
(PS. Does Morticia have a sister?)
How very nice to hear from you again, and how very observant you are. Yes, the Addamses are very fond of black, in all its shades and glory. As Mamma always likes to say:
If I did have to choose another color, it would be Indian Red.
(And, yes, Mamma does have a sister, my Aunt Ophelia. She is very Addams-y, and currently unattached in every sense of the word. However, I believe she has many ardent suitors amongst the Quechan tin magnates and llamas of Bolivia.)
Thank you.
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Dear Wednesday,n00less cluebie wrote:Dear Wednesday,
What is your favorite color?
Do you have any suggestions for how to deal with dullards who repeat questions previously asked or who might have forgotten about information you might have previously mentioned about pets such as dear Kitty cat?
-n00less cluebie
P.s. did you already remove poor Lanterns brains with your guillotine?
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Dearest Wednesday Adams,
Bambi meets Godzilla is one of my all time favorite films. I am delighted and impressed that you have seen it.
I offer you another fine piece of cinema in the same vein (as it were).
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rG2Gpjo5KL4
Please let me know what you think. I encourage you to watch until the very end so as not to miss any of the action.
fondly,
-Llama
Bambi meets Godzilla is one of my all time favorite films. I am delighted and impressed that you have seen it.
I offer you another fine piece of cinema in the same vein (as it were).
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rG2Gpjo5KL4
Please let me know what you think. I encourage you to watch until the very end so as not to miss any of the action.
fondly,
-Llama
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Dear Mr. Plane crazy,plane crazy wrote:Hello Wednesday,
I like the cut-of-your-jib.
Would ya wanna go out on a date with me?
Sincerely,
PC
Thank you very much for the compliment. I think your jib is pretty nifty, too. But, alas, I must point out two salient facts.
1) My jib is underage, and thus illegal in all fifty states.
2) Even if you happen to hail from San Diego, Kyrgyzstan, I have been betrothed to another from the cradle. This makes dating rather problematic for me.
Please don't fret. We can still be friends. I would encourage you to put me out of your mind and date many, many, many, many, many, many people.
Thank you.
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Dear Mr. Lantern,Lantern wrote:Dear Wednesday,
I am growing fond of our little chats. I feel like I know you so much better!
I am curious about any pets that you either have or have had in the past and what their names might be.
Sincerely,
Lantern
My, what an inquisitive nature you have! Are you sure you're not a long-lost Addams relative?
Our family always has a number of pets. These creatures give us hours of pleasure. I especially enjoy the discomfiture of our neighbors and other unexpected visitors.
In addition to Kitty Kat, at the moment our household includes Tristan and Isolde (our piranha couple), Zelda the vulture, Pugley's octopus Aristotle, and of course Cleopatra, Mamma's African Strangler. Homer, Euclid, Archimedes, Sophocles, Euripides and Herodotus are my spiders. My favorite, Aristophanes, was sadly exploring a bit too close to Cleopatra one day, and we haven't seen him since. Cousin Itt has promised to find a nice mouse spider for me when he next visits Slaughter Falls in Queensland, Australia. I frownie-faced, until he showed me this picture.
Thank you.
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Dear Mr. kude,kude wrote:Dear Wednesday,
Firstly, have you tried the Catacombs in Paris? I think that you would very much enjoy them. Second, if there is one thing you'd want for your birthday, what would it be?
How very lovely to hear from you again.
Yes, I have visited the Catacombs beneath Paris. Cousin Cackle lives there now, after leaving the caves beneath our house for a more continental atmosphere. If you plan a visit, I am sure he would love to see you.
If there was one thing I could have for my birthday? A party. With balloons and streamers and laughing blonde girls in dresses with blue satin sashes and clowns. Lots of clowns.
NOT.
Thank you.
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Dear Mr. Drifter,Drifter wrote:Dear Wednesday,
I have to ask, cause the morbid curiosity got the best of me. What is your preferred method when dismembering a voodoo bugbear?
Wub ya,
Drifter
Are you perchance from the South? Your open and affectionate greeting, combined with the very practical yet morbid nature of your question, would lead me to believe so. Toad Suck, perhaps? It sounds positively delightful.
One must exercise the greatest caution when dealing with a voodoo bugbear. I know the temptation to dismember them and put their little red noses on one's lapel as a badge is almost irresistible, but I implore you.
There is only one safe way to deal with a voodoo bugbear.
Thank you.
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Dear Miss Llux Llama,Llux Llama wrote:Dearest Wednesday Adams,
Bambi meets Godzilla is one of my all time favorite films. I am delighted and impressed that you have seen it.
I offer you another fine piece of cinema in the same vein (as it were).
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rG2Gpjo5KL4
Please let me know what you think. I encourage you to watch until the very end so as not to miss any of the action.
fondly,
-Llama
How very considerate of you to share veins. May I stroke your silky fur again?
As for your film choice, one word: Art.
Thank you.
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