What vehicle would you recommend...

[The Silken Knot]

... to be prepared for the coming zombie apocalypse? And why?

I'm talking normal, non-military, earthbound, easily purchased vehicles. No jets. No boats (although, that could be intriguing... and I have watched '28 Days Later' enough times to want one of those stashed away as well).

I've scratched RVs. Fuel guzzlers. Not terribly maneuverable.

Ideas?

[Symbiosis]

Stay off the roads unless you're bringing serious firepower!

[Dangerous Beans]

[sasquatch]

1980's Toyota pickup truck like Marty McFly had in "Back To The Future"... solid axle, carburetor, 22R engine...

[The Silken Knot]

Now we're talking.

∞ TSK suspects that Dangerous Beans is in the employ of the Zombie Council... ∞

[n00less cluebie]

The most important attribute you need when avoiding the Zombie Horde is MANUEVERABILITY! That's why I recommend a unicycle



It's impressive turn-radius combined with the height to remain above the horde allow you to avoid them when you can, and the hands-free aspect of the unicycle allows you to simultaneously pie and/or pin them when forced to.

*mic drop*

[The Silken Knot]

Clown!

[plane crazy]

My 2006 Nissan xterra 4x4 is my fav vehicle of all time. Powerful, climb anything, fun, comfy. All critical to surviving zombie apothecaries sitchiations.

[GFips]

[The Silken Knot]

*sigh*

That is beautiful. I might not survive being overrun by zombies, but I'd die happy.

[sasquatch]

The most important attribute you need when avoiding the Zombie Horde is MANUEVERABILITY! That's why I recommend a unicycle



It's impressive turn-radius combined with the height to remain above the horde allow you to avoid them when you can, and the hands-free aspect of the unicycle allows you to simultaneously pie and/or pin them when forced to.

TSK explicitly said "non-military" in her request.

[sasquatch]

I am no expert (where is Drifter?), but I believe the first day of Zombie Apocalypse is going to arrive with EMPs. All delicate electronics will be fried instantly so you need to have an old school (pre fuel injection) engine in your vehicle. It's one of the rules...

[Drifter]

Sure, everyone makes fun of me til there's a Zombie Apocalypse.

Well, since Sas asked...

I personally miss my 1979 Jeep Cherokee, complete with the snow plow attachment (for those zombie herds). It was a great rig until the neighbors tree limb fell and crushed it... (I asked that SOB to trim the dead wood out of the tree a few times... f'ker wouldn't do it)

But for what you asked, IMHO, whatever you decide on should have a diesel motor, and something from the late 70's or earlier. The older vehicles without a computer (supposedly) won't be affected by an EMP like sasquatch said. And a gas burner won't last very long because the ethanol additive used today makes gas go bad quick, and will probably kill the motor after a few months in a Zombie Apocalypse scenario (there won't be any fresh gas supplies, just what is available when it starts).

Diesel fuel last dang near forever, and the motor will run on street grade diesel, farm grade diesel, peanut oil, Automatic Transmission Fluid, used (but strained) vegetable oil, and other fluids if you looked... I've even been told the oil in electric transformers in a pinch (if you can get it down from the telephone pole). You just gotta keep the block warm if it gets below freezing or the fuel will gel (there's a built in heater with a plug under the hood for an extension cord).

Also, a standard transmission is a must. A starter battery will only last a few years at best without a solar trickle charger, but you can start a standard vehicle by push starting (try to park on an incline), or with a rope even...



An old Dodge or Chevy truck would be optimal, because you can haul all of your crap in the back (or your freeloader friends). But there are diesel powered, foreign made cars running around out there that don't have a computer, it'll just be harder to get replacement parts. You can find a donor truck about every 15 feet if you get out of the city, and they're loads easier to work on.


Let me know if I can cause any more problems...

[The Silken Knot]

You rascal!

[Centrico]

Which?

That's easy...

I'd recommend Daryl Dixon's '60s Triumph Bonneville TR6c

Why?

Fuel Efficiency
Proven battle ready
Room for The Special Kitten to come along
No matter where you park it or who steals it the bike always comes back
Allows for 720 degree crossbow zombie ownage
And of course, Daryl is a bad ass

Need I say more?

[n00less cluebie]

Pfft. Everything you described STILL applies to the combat unicycle

[The Silken Knot]

[Centrico]

Lies, the unicycle doesn't have room for two!

[n00less cluebie]

Check and Mate

[Centrico]

Damn, I stand corrected, that could definitely be a multi-purpose position.

[n00less cluebie]

For the non-purist you can get the mechanized version

[sasquatch]

After considering Drifter's post, I believe we are overthinking this and what you really need is a classic diesel like this old Benz! Add run-flat tires, blacked out windows and a cattle guard up front. You will have a few hundred thousand miles of post-zombie apocalypse luxury. Imagine fetching your picnic basket from the trunk of this beauty as society crumbles all around...

[Drifter]

Now you're thinkin Sasquatch. Throw a transfer tank in the back of that and you're good to go.

[Dangerous Beans]

In the inevitable zombie apocalypse we will still be able to syphon fuel from the cars of victims.

[Drifter]

Don't forget, gas with ethanol starts to go bad within a few months... until then don't waste your time siphoning, just drill a hole into the belly of the gas tank and drain it from the bottom. Just don't do it in a way that'll cause sparks, maybe look for a vehicle with a plastic tank.

(if you create sparks doin it and blow yourself smooth the f*ck up, don't come cryin to me, I done warned ya)

[Centrico]

(if you create sparks doin it and blow yourself smooth the f*ck up, don't come cryin to me, I done warned ya)

Not to mention, even if you do survive the explosion, now you have a butt load of zombies headed your way because of the noise...



Can you say... "Darwin Award"?