The holy Church of Lux

Preserving History. Honoring Excellence.
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Kef
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Post by Kef » Thu Dec 16, 2004 11:53 am

§ Hurray! Monthey Python! §

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Mike
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Post by Mike » Fri Dec 17, 2004 9:42 am

el toro wrote::shock:

brothers,
the little lamb L33t has gone astray. he has decided to join mike church of satanic penis mutilation. please lift him up in prayer. even though he hasn't used his wee willy winky yet, it seems sad for him to lose his little python.

oh... and don't forget the bake sale on saturday. Preacherman is bringing his famous tobacco and coffee cookies!

Lincoln ROCKS on!
brother toro
ET what we need here in the forum is a tolerance. Not Ignorance! You Mock my church of reform... in return "I Fart in your General Direction, Your mother was a hamster, and your father smelt of Elder-berries"... MP, Holy Grail.

Mike

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Preacherman
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Post by Preacherman » Thu Jan 06, 2005 9:41 pm

∞ mbauer finally springs for a new stained glass window ∞

Image




Edited to fix the picture, it was a broken link...

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rob
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Post by rob » Thu Jan 06, 2005 9:56 pm

LMFAO!

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SET
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Post by SET » Thu Jan 06, 2005 11:19 pm

Shouldn't there be a duck sticking out of someone's butt in the pic in the new window? I mean such an important artifact should be historically accurate shouldn't it?

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Smaug
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Post by Smaug » Thu Jan 06, 2005 11:59 pm

Preacherman wrote:∞ mbauer finally springs for a new stained glass window ∞

Image
How do you insert a pic that is on my computer and not an http addy?

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el toro
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Post by el toro » Fri Jan 07, 2005 5:28 pm

thank you mb for the wonderful new stained glass window.
however, the church elders were hoping for an image of Lincoln or saint Dustin.

oh well....

it is "nice" to see the artist was able to capture the bond between you and kef.

you may now have the title of "Fig Lord"

peace,
brother toro.

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mbauer
Not A Truck
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Post by mbauer » Fri Jan 07, 2005 5:40 pm

∞ mbauer bows ∞

I got it for a bargain. The one with Lincoln on it didn't really do him justice, and the one with Saint Dustin just showed him on vacation all the time and not doing any real work. I thought that might be a little innapropriate. So I settled on this one.

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Preacherman
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Post by Preacherman » Fri Jan 07, 2005 9:28 pm

I also think we need to start taking advantage of the Church of Lux's as yet untapped revenue possibilities...the $5 admissions just aren't covering expenses.

Plastic figures of Lincoln, maybe with a top hat with interchangeable 'beards of fury', and a can o mighty smite hidden under the top hat, along these lines:

http://www.jesuschristsuperstore.net/lf ... lfgod.html

We could sell special edition official Lux Ducks and get this guy to make them for us - goodness knows we have a vast collection of turds here he can use:

http://www.turdbirds.com

Finally, we of course need to set up some fig revenue sharing deal with this guy:

http://www.godhatesfigs.com/

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mbauer
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Post by mbauer » Fri Jan 07, 2005 9:40 pm

EAT A FIG, GO TO HELL


That's blasphemy if ever I heard it!

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pale kate
man will fall
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Post by pale kate » Fri Jan 07, 2005 10:06 pm

I'm torn. I'm already a member here: http://www.landoverbaptist.org/

Besides, it appears to be male only. I'm just glad I'm not the one to break it to Aqua.

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michelle
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Post by michelle » Fri Jan 07, 2005 10:17 pm

pale kate wrote:I'm torn. I'm already a member here: http://www.landoverbaptist.org/

Besides, it appears to be male only. I'm just glad I not the one to break it to Aqua.
Damn can you get one of the "what would Jesus do" thongs even if your not a MEMBER........If so I would like to pre-order one please.

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AquaRegia
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Post by AquaRegia » Sat Jan 08, 2005 11:50 am

It's OK kate - you've convinced me to get in touch with my feminine side and embrace my "inner girl". Think of me as gender-transcendent from now on. Together we will fight the evils of male-dominated social structures, paint our nails, and go shopping.

That Landover Baptist site is the highlight of my month - I LOVE it. Thanks so much!

Preach - those ads are a friggin' riot, and the window (which would not load at school - go figure) made me laugh so hard it hurt (once I finally saw it).

All you luxers ROCK like LINCOLN.

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mbauer
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Post by mbauer » Sun Jan 09, 2005 12:54 pm

Smaug wrote: How do you insert a pic that is on my computer and not an http addy?
∞ mbauer summons St. Dustin to answer this question by offering fresh figs, the fruit of Lincoln, and sacrificing a duck upon the alter of the Church ∞

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Baden
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Post by Baden » Sun Jan 09, 2005 5:43 pm

Better let Monty Phyton comment this stuff:

"O Lord, please don't burn us.
Don't grill or toast Your flock.
Don't put us on the barbecue
Or simmer us in stock.
Don't braise or bake or boil us
Or stir-fry us in a wok.
Oh, please don't lightly poach us
Or baste us with hot fat.
Don't fricassee or roast us
Or boil us in a vat,
And please don't stick Thy servants, Lord,
In a Rotissomat."

For secular recipes refer to Michelle!

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pale kate
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Post by pale kate » Sun Jan 09, 2005 7:07 pm

AquaRegia wrote:It's OK kate - you've convinced me to get in touch with my feminine side and embrace my "inner girl". Think of me as gender-transcendent from now on. Together we will fight the evils of male-dominated social structures, paint our nails, and go shopping.

That Landover Baptist site is the highlight of my month - I LOVE it. Thanks so much!
Glad you enjoyed the site. I'm glad you have come to terms with your inner girl. Letting men think they are dominating isn't a bad thing in controlled doses.


Btw Michelle, the JC thongs ROCK so you need to order some. I'm also sporting a matching holy ghost bra.

Badden- loved the verse.

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michelle
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Post by michelle » Sun Jan 09, 2005 7:13 pm

cool I will have to stock up on both thanks for the tip babe

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BarStar
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Post by BarStar » Sun Jan 09, 2005 7:47 pm

BarStar walks in church and kneels....



and asks for a job....polishing the Lincoln statue maybe?

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shock-n-ya'll
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post

Post by shock-n-ya'll » Mon Jan 10, 2005 12:59 am

:shock: shock wants to know where he can piss around here! :shock:

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mbauer
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Re: post

Post by mbauer » Mon Jan 10, 2005 8:33 am

shock-n-ya'll wrote::shock: shock wants to know where he can piss around here! :shock:
∞ mbauer points to a dark corner opposite the 70s porn chest ∞
BarStar wrote:BarStar walks in church and kneels....
and asks for a job....polishing the Lincoln statue maybe?
∞ mbauer bestows upon BarStar the job of caretaker of the dark corner opposite the 70s porn chest

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BarStar
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Post by BarStar » Mon Jan 10, 2005 8:45 am

YEAH a long title is great!

As <i> official caretaker of the dark corner opposite the 70s porn chest </i> I head there to check it out.....


Hey shock! :shock: ... get the hell out of here...NO PISSIN IN THE CHURCH! :shock:

good thing i'm not the piss boy....

God! look at this MESS!....shit, what did you drink! Empty your hump somewhere else..dammit.

PISS BOY!.....OH piss boy...piss boy!

Oh, by the way....i love my new lapel pin..

Image

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AquaRegia
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Post by AquaRegia » Mon Jan 10, 2005 9:46 am

LOL! You guys are killing me! :lol:

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shock-n-ya'll
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Post by shock-n-ya'll » Mon Jan 10, 2005 8:01 pm

:shock: god damit its dark in here... oh shit what was that... smells like shit... it is shit damit sombody turn on the light !! :idea:

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shock-n-ya'll
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Post by shock-n-ya'll » Mon Jan 10, 2005 8:03 pm

:shock: damit i think i got some on my suspenders oh man!!! that sucks :x :x :smt067

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Smaug
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Re: post

Post by Smaug » Wed Jan 12, 2005 4:20 pm

shock-n-ya'll wrote::shock: damit i think i got some on my suspenders oh man!!! that sucks :x :x :smt067
<blushing> ahem....er....technically, that is...uh..."manure".....

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danmax
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Post by danmax » Wed Jan 12, 2005 7:23 pm

Here's an interesting little clip about proper toilet etiquette:

Toilet Time

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furball
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Post by furball » Thu Jan 13, 2005 3:33 am

[Ten pages later :shock: ]

You all are going to hell. Ain't no doubt. You got just one hope. Repeat after me:

Image

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el toro
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Post by el toro » Thu Jan 13, 2005 10:50 am

ahhh ...

furry you are our cute critter for christ.

Locked